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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26216017">Starting Over</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/FreshBreathOfEyre/pseuds/FreshBreathOfEyre'>FreshBreathOfEyre</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Original Character(s), Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 09:21:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>17,675</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26216017</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/FreshBreathOfEyre/pseuds/FreshBreathOfEyre</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After her divorce is finalized, Kate packs up and moves across the country to NYC.  On her second night in the city, her cousin invites her out to meet new people.  What she doesn’t expect, is meeting Sebastian Stan and Chris Evans.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Chris Evans (Actor)/Original Female Character(s), Sebastian Stan &amp; Original Female Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>45</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>KATE</p>
<p>How the hell did I get here?</p>
<p>I’ve asked myself this every day for the last year, but it takes on a whole new meaning sitting in my new apartment, surrounded by boxes yet to be unpacked, and furniture yet to be assembled.  How the hell did I get here - thirty five, divorced, and living in a new city across the country from almost everyone I’ve ever known.  </p>
<p>Thankfully, my phone rang and interrupted any wallowing I was about to sink into.  My cousin was the only person I knew in New York, and we hadn’t seen each other in seventeen years.  I took a deep breath and answered.</p>
<p>“Hey, Aubree.”</p>
<p>“Hey!  How was your first night?”</p>
<p>“It was fine — a little loud.”  A little loud was an understatement.  Before moving, I lived on an island in the Puget Sound — the only noises I heard at night were waves lapping against the rocks or crickets in the fields.  Never sirens blaring, or horns honking, and certainly not people shouting.  It all felt foreign — like I was a whole world away instead of the mere 2,840 miles I drove last week.</p>
<p>“You’ll get used to it — it takes time.  But pretty soon you won’t be able to sleep without the sound of the city outside your window!”  It’s probably true — she had moved from her family’s ranch in her mid-twenties.  I wondered how long it would take to get used to.  I realized I hadn’t responded when she continued after a moment.</p>
<p>“Anyway, I was going to see if you wanted to come meet a few of my friends tonight.  Marcus is having a small social at his place — you’ll love it!”</p>
<p>My instinct was to search for an excuse not to go.  “I don’t know Marcus — I don’t want to crash his social or whatever.”</p>
<p>“Well, duh — the point is for you to meet people.”  She was right.  I could hear my dads voice in my head.  “It’s good to experience new places on your own... but you need people too.”</p>
<p>“Okay,” I sighed after a moment.  “Where do I go and how do I get there?” </p>
<p>“Great!!  I’ll text you the address — I can’t wait to see you!  I can’t believe how long it’s been!”  And with that, she hung up.  </p>
<p>Given how hard it was for me to park my SUV, I figured I wouldn’t be driving anywhere any time soon.  I hadn’t experienced the subway yet, and I definitely wasn’t about to have my first time be at night.  Taxi it was.  Do you have to whistle to hail a taxi?  Wait, is it taxi or cab?  I can’t whistle... Is there a specific arm movement?  I felt ridiculous for wanting to Google this.</p>
<p>My phone buzzed when Aubree’s text came in.  I put the address in my phone, and it was only a few blocks from my apartment.  I never expected to be relieved to have walking as my mode of transportation.  </p>
<p>An hour later, I looked in the mirror and decided this was as good as it was going to get.  I had curled my long chocolate hair into loose waves, that fell to my mid-back.  I wore a cream tank that contrasted nicely with my summer complexion.  The high waisted black jeans were faded and frayed, but they hugged my body without making me feel constricted.  Since I wasn’t going far, I decided on suede, olive green peep toe booties.  </p>
<p>When I moved, I saw it as starting over — and you can’t start over with old clothes.  The problem was, I didn’t know how these new clothes would make me feel.  I stared at my reflection until I convinced myself I was feeling confident... I think.</p>
<p>I grabbed my clutch, my phone, and my keys and started towards the door.  I looked back and saw Charlie, my black German Shepherd, laying on the couch.</p>
<p>“Guard our shit, Charlie — I’ll be back.”</p>
<p>He didn’t even lift his head. Yep — he’s terrifying.</p>
<p>And with that, I left to go meet Aubree.</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>Fifteen minutes, and one misdirection later, I text Aubree that I’m around the corner.  As I’m walking into the modern lobby, she texts back and asks what I’m wearing.</p>
<p>The fuck?</p>
<p>Does... Is this... Shit.  Is this like a fancy thing?  </p>
<p>Fuck it — I’m not a fancy girl, so this is what they’re getting.  Plus, it’s one night and then who knows — I may never see these people again.</p>
<p>I take the elevator up to the top floor, then the stairs to the roof.  I stop as I round the corner — my definition of “small social” apparently differs from Aubree’s.  Or, the more likely excuse, she sugar coated it to get me here.  There had to be almost a hundred people here.  They were mingling by bar top tables, surrounded by string lights and trellises with climbing greenery.</p>
<p>Aubree saw me while I was still surveying the crowd and debating on running — she exclaimed and came walking over.  No... not walking.  Strutting.  She came strutting over like a model on a catwalk — she was wearing a sleek red jumpsuit with black strappy heels.  It was impossible not to notice her — but that’s always been Aubree.  When we were kids, she dressed up for Halloween as Suzy Scarlett — what the fuck is Suzy Scarlett you ask?  No one knows.  When asked, Aubree would scoff and say, “Well she’s famous!” as if that answered it.</p>
<p>She pulls me into a tight embrace when she reaches me.  “I can’t believe you’re here!  We’re going to have so much fun!  Come, I’ve told everyone about you — I’ll introduce you.”</p>
<p>I cringe.  Thank God I’ve always been good about slapping on a smile.</p>
<p>She pulls me behind her introducing me to handfuls of people at a time.  They all blur together and I can’t remember one name.  Most of them are in the entertainment industry.  Some ask why I do — it’s hard to explain information security to people sometimes.  People outside of technology usually aren’t interested in vulnerability scans, phishing campaigns, or penetration tests.  By the fifth time, I just start saying that I am starting a job at Columbia in a few weeks.  It’s vague enough that it doesn’t require explaining, unless people probe for more information — none of them do. </p>
<p>We make our way to the bar and a man in his 40s walks up — he has a scruffy beard, longer hair, and has a certain theatricality about him.  Maybe it was the scarf in late August, or the fedora, or the leather pants — or all three together. </p>
<p>Aubree beams, “Kate, this is Marcus!”</p>
<p>Marcus delicately takes my hand at the introduction.  “My dear, I have heard so much about you!”  He steps back and appraises me, and I’m instantly uncomfortable.  </p>
<p>I clear my throat and try to think of something to say.  </p>
<p>Thankfully, he continues, “Please excuse me, but I must steal your ravishing cousin for just the slightest of moments.  I promise to return her promptly.”  He whisks Aubree away in a way that is so dramatic, that I feel like I’m having an out of body experience.  </p>
<p>I turn to the bar and after ordering a double gin and tonic, I say under my breath, “Weird fucking dude...”</p>
<p>A stifled laugh to my left caught me off guard.  I slowly turned and made eye contact with a pair of steel blue eyes that made my breath hitch in my throat.</p>
<p>“Yeah... that Marcus...  he’s a... well he’s a character for sure.”</p>
<p>His voice is smooth — deep, sultry, and almost sleepy sounding.  His dark hair is a little longer and has a slight wave to it.  He has a short beard that has some speckling of gray.  And his lips... oh my God is he smirking at me?  I swallow hard and realize I’m staring. </p>
<p>“Shit... sorry I didn’t know anyone was next to me.” I start panicking and try to backpedal.  “He seems nice and this place is super cool.  My cousin really likes him...”  I assumed — I really have no idea. </p>
<p>The stranger holds up a hand, almost in defense.  “You’re fine,” he laughs.  “I won’t tell anyone I caught you mumbling to yourself.”  His laugh reaches his eyes and my knees go weak.  </p>
<p>I try to relax and smile back at him. “I’m Kate.”</p>
<p>He grabs his beer off the bar, turns towards me, holds his right hand out to me and says, “I’m Sebastian.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>SEBASTIAN</p><p>I saw her first.  And not in a way that stakes a claim — it’s just a fact.  </p><p>Chris is contemplating signing on for another production on Broadway, so he’s crashing at my place while he figures out whether or not he’s actually interested.  Night one, he drags me to this uppity roof party with people who would say anything to your face, and a whole lot more behind your back.  I was ready to leave as soon as I got there — this was never really my scene.  It wasn’t Chris’ either — he smoked half a joint before we came to chill out.  But it was the job.  </p><p>I was standing with Chris near the stairs when she walked in.  We hadn’t been there long, but Chris was talking to someone he met when he was in Lobby Hero, so I was looking around for anyone else I may know.  She rounded the corner and stopped  — she looked like a deer in headlights that wanted to run.  Her long brown hair hung past the middle of her back, where it met black jeans that hugged every curve of her body.  She looked like she was contemplating her escape when a tall blonde in a red getup strode over, hugged her, and pulled her through the crowd.  </p><p>For the next hour, Chris and I worked through the crowd of people, laughing at their jokes and nodding when they name dropped.  Again, it was part of the job — but it wasn’t what I wanted to be doing on a Friday night.  Every now and then, I’d spot the brunette that walked in and wonder if our paths would cross in the crowd.  Any time we got closer, the blonde seemed to pull her in the opposite direction. </p><p>Chris was in the middle of a conversation and I decided I needed another drink if I was going to stay here.  As I was walked toward the bar, I saw that the brunette was there with the blonde, talking to Marcus.  Ugh, Marcus.  He’s a guy that thinks he’s bigger on Broadway than he really is — but he has a lot of connections.  I had tried my best to forget this was his place — the idea of being stuck in a conversation with him exhausted me.</p><p>I quietly walked up next to the brunette and ordered a beer.  Out of the corner of my eye, I could see that Marcus and the blonde had left, and now it was just the two of us.  I was thinking of the best way to start a conversation with her when I hear her mumble “weird fucking dude...” I couldn’t help the laugh that escaped.  She turned toward me wide eyed in shock.  Shit, I scared her — fuck think of something to take the edge off.</p><p>“Yeah... that Marcus...  he’s a... well he’s a character for sure.”</p><p>I smiled slightly hoping to ease the awkwardness of my eavesdropping.  Her green eyes were locked on mine, with her lips slightly parted.  Her lips were full and pink, and I couldn’t help thinking how much I wanted to taste them.  As if she could read my mind, she bit her lower lip and when she did, I could feel my pants tighten.</p><p>“Shit... sorry I didn’t know anyone was next to me.  He seems nice and this place is super cool.  My cousin really likes him...”</p><p>So the blonde must be her cousin.  I laugh to lighten the mood, and try to keep the conversation going.  “You’re fine — I won’t tell anyone I caught you mumbling to yourself.”  </p><p>She smiles back at me, and I swear my heart stopped.  “I’m Kate.”</p><p>I grabbed my beer and turned toward her.  “I’m Sebastian,” I say and I reach to shake her hand.</p><p>She puts her hand in mine and it’s like there’s an electric current in my veins.  She pulls away first and I wonder if she felt it too. </p><p>Suddenly, there’s a large hand clapping down on my left shoulder.  Kate looks to my right and there’s Chris, giving her his all American boy smile.</p><p>“Hey!  What are you two talking about over here by your lonesome?”</p><p>Fuck.  If I ever had a chance with her, it just vanished.  Chris was better at this than me.  He never stumbled over his words and he always knew what to say.  It didn’t hurt that he was Captain fucking America.  </p><p>“Hey, man — Kate, this is Chris.  Chris, this is Kate.”</p><p>“Kate, nice to meet ya” Chris says as he shakes her hand.  “So how do you know Marcus?  You on Broadway?”</p><p>Kate laughs and almost spits gin all over us. “Uhm definitely not. No offense...  I just... I would be a human disaster on a stage in front of people. My cousin...” she points with her drink “...she invited me.  I just moved to the city about 23 hours ago and she figured I should meet people.”</p><p>Right on cue, the blond saunters over.  “Now see, I was worried I’d left you alone too long and you would have bailed.  But look at you - making not one but two friends.”  She eyes Chris and I up and down with recognition in her eyes.  “Hi, I’m Aubree.  I’m friends with Marcus.”  She says it as if it’s an accomplishment.  Poor thing.</p><p>The four of us stand there talking for I don’t know how long.  More accurately, Kate and I stood there listening to Chris and Aubree talk.  I wanted to find an excuse to be alone with her, but the closest I got was a few dozen stolen glances.  The next thing we knew, the four of us were the last people on the roof.</p><p>I wasn’t ready to say goodbye — to not know whether or not I’d see her again.  So I took a chance and said “Is anyone else hungry?”</p><p>Kate laughed and wrapped her arms around her stomach saying, “I’m always hungry!”</p><p>Oh I liked her.</p><p>Aubree shouted “Oh!  Kate’s place is just around the corner!  We can all go hang out there!”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>KATE</p>
<p>“Kate’s place is just around the corner!  We can all go hang out there!”</p>
<p>What the fuck was Aubree thinking?  </p>
<p>I tried to get out of it, but each “it’s a mess — there’s boxes everywhere“ was met with a “that’s okay — we don’t care.”  And so, here it was — 11:18pm and I’m walking into my building with my cousin, Captain America, and Winter fucking Soldier.  Why did they say yes?  Isn’t that weird — going to the apartment of someone you didn’t know?  </p>
<p>Sure we spent the last two hours standing around together, but it was primarily Aubree and Chris talking.  I listened and nodded along when I was supposed to, but Sebastian had my focus.  When we shook hands, there was this charge, this energy.  Almost a shock — so much so that I had to pull my hand away.  Since then, I was hyper aware of his presence and our proximity.  I wanted to feel that surge of energy again — I kept willing his fingers to brush mine when we were walking. As quickly as those thoughts came, I would push them away.  He’s Sebastian Stan, and who am I?  Just a 35 year old divorcée trying to start her life over... a nobody.</p>
<p>As we stepped off the elevator, I couldn’t help thinking again, how the hell did I get here?</p>
<p>I unlocked the door and I could hear Charlie’s low growl.  “Uhm — so FYI — my dog’s not mean at all, but he is a little protective.  So just let his smell you before you pet him or anything.  He may growl... He shouldn’t bite...”  That’s all I need — Charlie to bite one of these two.  I’d have to pack up and move further away to escape the embarrassment.</p>
<p>We walked in and Charlie jumped off the couch, ran past me, and stopped the others in their tracks.  I looked over my shoulder to see Charlie standing between us with his hackles raised.  “Charlie, lass es.  Hier.”  Charlie stopped and came toward me wagging his tail.  I bent over petting him. “Sorry — I adopted him from a military program so takes his job seriously,” I laughed awkwardly.  “He’s fine now, I promise.”</p>
<p>Aubree walked up first and dropped down to pet Charlie, followed by Sebastian, and then Chris.  </p>
<p>While they were distracted, I surveyed my apartment — I needed seating and food.  Drinks also felt like a priority.  All in all, I guess it could be worse.  I went out this morning to grab some snacks and picked up some beers — they seemed necessary for unpacking.  And this is New York — wasn’t good available at all hours of the night?  Charlie has been sleeping on the green suede couch, but thankfully he was clean and wasn’t shedding terribly bad at the moment.  There were two brown leather chairs that I could move so we could all talk to each other.  Other than being surrounded by boxes, it wasn’t in terrible shape.  I grabbed the google speaker and connected my phone — I selected a Spotify playlist of 70s rock songs to play in the background.</p>
<p>“You guys want beers?  I may have some tequila somewhere too” I called over my shoulder.  I put my hands on my hips and eyed the boxes that said kitchen.  Why didn’t I label one liquor?  That seems like it would have been a good idea.</p>
<p>“Beer is good,” said a low voice behind me.  I whirled around and was inches from Sebastian’s face.  I sucked in a deep breath and it was like I could taste him.  He smiled and put a hand on my arm apologetically.  “Sorry — I didn’t mean to sneak up on you — I was going to see if you needed any help.”</p>
<p>My skin was tingling where his hand touched me.  I wanted to feel his hands all over my body.  Just the thought sent shockwaves between my thighs.  </p>
<p>“Oh — you’re fine.  Thank you.”  I turned to distract myself from my thoughts.  “Uhm... I don’t really have food other than some random snacks, and I don’t know about you, but coconut chips really aren’t going to cut it right now.  I’m thinking maybe we can call in take-out?”</p>
<p>“Sounds good to me,” he said as I handed him two Modelo’s.  </p>
<p>As we walked back to the living room, I felt Sebastian’s hand on the small of my back.  When we got there, Charlie was snoring on one end of the couch, and Aubree and Chris were in the chairs facing each other talking.  I gave Aubree her beer and suggested take-out, then shook Charlie awake and pointed to the floor in front of the couch.  “Platz, Charlie.”  He lazily got off the couch, laid where I pointed, and looked at me expectantly.  I took his spot on the couch and pet his head in front of me.  </p>
<p>Sebastian gave Chris his beer and sat on the couch next to me.  When he did, his leg rested against mine, and I had never been more grateful to have a small couch.  I can’t recall ever being more in tune with another person’s proximity to me. </p>
<p>Aubree and Chris had decided that perogies from Veselka sounded the best and called in our order.  I’ve never had a perogie before, but the picture looked good and she ordered a potato kind that couldn’t possibly be bad.  There really were no bad potatoes... except vodka.  But even that had its moments.</p>
<p>“Are you fluent?” Sebastian asked.  </p>
<p>“Hmm?”  I was so focused on touching him that I wasn’t really sure what he was talking about.</p>
<p>“German — I thought that’s what you were speaking to Charlie.”</p>
<p>“Oh!  No... I’m fluent in military commands but that’s about it.”  When he looked quizzically at me, I took the opportunity to turn my body towards his to elaborate, bringing my right leg up on the couch so that it rested against his left thigh. The constant touch was exhilarating.  “There’s a program, in Texas.  They adopt out dogs that were bomb dogs, or TSA dogs, or police dogs.  Some are retired, and some failed a test at some point in their career.  Charlie was training as a TSA dog, but failed the narcotics portion.  He only knows commands in German, and my learning them helped seal the adoption.  It made the transition a little easier on him too.”</p>
<p>He smiled and looked affectionately at Charlie, which just about shattered my heart.  “That’s really cool that they do that!”</p>
<p>“Yea — most that retire go with their handler.  But the ones that fail sometimes aren’t so lucky.  Sometimes people just see them as part of the job.”</p>
<p>After a beat he asked, “So you said you’ve been here a day, right?  What brings you to the city?”</p>
<p>I contemplated a moment before speaking.  I could say it was a job.  I could not mention my ex-husband.  I could say that I needed a change or that I missed my cousin.  I could make up any excuse.  But, there was something genuine about the way Sebastian looked at me — I wanted him to know me.  All of me and in every way possible.</p>
<p>I took a deep breath and started.  “It was a million different reasons.  About a year ago, my husband filed for divorce.  There was a... situation... that we couldn’t realistically move past.  And divorce was the option that hurt the fewest people.  It made sense, logically.  Which probably shows that there were other underlying issues, right?  We lived in a small community — everyone knew everything about each other.  And even though I worked in Seattle — it just seemed like everywhere I went, that was looming over my head.  I didn’t want to be defined by that anymore.  So I called some colleagues and heard about an opening at Columbia.  I hadn’t been to New York since high school, but it felt right.  I remember the energy of the city — I thought it could revitalize me — like I could start over here.”</p>
<p>I hadn’t realized I had been looking down the whole time, or that I was slowly peeling the label off my beer bottle.  What I did notice, was when Sebastian gently placed his hand on mine — it was a comforting feeling.  To reach out to someone and be acknowledged is a human need.  I looked and deep into his eyes.  Tentatively, I stopped peeling the label and laced my fingers through his while his thumb stroked my knuckle.</p>
<p>“You’re right.  New York is a great place to start over.”  He said it not so much as a comfort — but more as a fact.  </p>
<p>For the first time in a year, I allowed myself to feel hopeful.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>SEBASTIAN </p><p>She looked so vulnerable.  In that moment, I wanted to just comfort her.  I needed to comfort her.  </p><p>She hadn’t pulled away when I placed my hand on the small of her back, or when I sat down close enough to her that my leg rested against hers.  She even turned into it at one point.  </p><p>But watching her talk about her husband leaving — I had to be the one that gave her some comfort.  I reached over and placed my hand on hers.  She had been picking at the label on her beer bottle for a while.  When she looked up and met my gaze, I swear she could see into my soul.  She laced her fingers through mine, and it took all my strength not to lean forward and kiss her.  Not to stroke her hair and hold her to me.  Not to taste her breath in my mouth.</p><p>“You’re right.  New York is a great place to start over.”  I knew this from experience. </p><p>She smiled at me, and just when it looked like she was going to say something, the buzzer went off.  We jumped apart like two high school kids who had been caught by parents.  My eyes followed her as she stood up and walked over to answer the door.  As I glanced away, I caught Chris smirking in my direction, and I rolled my eyes.  </p><p>It didn’t take a genius to guess that I wasn’t the only one who noticed Kate.  Chris was a self proclaimed ass man — he even said it in interviews.  Even though it wasn’t the first thing that caught my eye, you’d have to blind not to notice Kate’s curves, especially in those tight jeans.  And if I had thought about how her ass would feel in my hands, then I could guarantee that Chris had thought the same thing.  Just knowing that made me a little jealous — which is ridiculous.  Because as much as I wanted her, she wasn’t mine.</p><p>“Oh my God, food!!  I’m starving!”  Aubree almost growled her statement — like her stomach was talking for her.  </p><p>Kate laughed and set the take-out boxes in front of Aubree.  “Here — calm your soul!”  She turned toward the kitchen and then came back with four more beers.</p><p>It was quiet while we were eating — we must have been hungrier than we thought.  </p><p>Aubree turns towards Chris and smiles. “So you were in Lobby Hero, right?”</p><p>Here we go... Chris smiles his best aw shucks smile in response.</p><p>“I thought that’s where I remembered you from — I worked on that production — I was only an understudy.”  She said it like it wasn’t a big deal, but even I knew how fierce the scene was on Broadway. </p><p>Chris stopped chewing and stared at her.  He squinted and cocked his head a little to the side.  I knew him well enough to know that he was trying to remember if they had slept together.  “Were you?  That’s awesome!  Did we ever hangout or anything?  I’m sorry, I get my productions mixed up sometimes.”  He didn’t.  </p><p>If they had slept together, Aubree was kind enough to let him off the hook and say that they only spoke a few times in passing.  Kate and I listened while they made small talk about the play — sharing gossip from behind the curtains.  </p><p>I leaned over to Kate, “What’d you think of the perogies?”</p><p>She smiled and took a sip of her beer.  “They were so good — it’s dangerous for me to have that many carbs so close.”  She leaned back on the couch with one foot on the ground and one knee up, and giggled.  “I think the potato ones changed my life!”</p><p>I leaned back next to her, holding my beer in my right hand, and draped my left arm over her right knee, slowly stroking the inside of her right calf with my thumb.  She didn’t pull away, but instead, leaned her leg into me a bit — like this is how we sit all the time.  She didn’t pull away when Aubree’s volume kicked it into high gear.</p><p>“I have the best idea!  Next weekend is Labor Day and I rented Kate and I a place upstate for...”</p><p>Kate cuts her off.  “Wait... what??”</p><p>Aubree sighs and continues as if Kate hadn’t spoke.  “Yes, for the weekend.  I figured we could float the river and go to some breweries or go wine tasting.  It’s beautiful country!”  Then she turns to Kate and says, “I figured you could use some time in the country before you are fully immersed into city life.”  Then turning to Chris and I, “You two should come.  We have a two bedroom place.  Kate can bunk with me, and you two can snuggle.  It’s perfect!”</p><p>No one responds for a moment.  Finally, Chris shrugs and says, “well I think our friend is coming to hang out next weekend, but...”</p><p>“Bring him!  There’s a sofa or he can get in bet with you two - I don’t care.  If we don’t want to see each other when we get there — then we can do separate things.  Ithaca isn’t that small.”</p><p>Kate says mater of factly, “Well I can’t leave Charlie overnight and I haven’t looked into boarding yet.”</p><p>“It’s pet friendly.  I assumed Charlie would want to play in the river.  Any other excuses y’all want to try?”  Aubree doesn’t take no for an answer.  And frankly, I was grateful.  She was giving me an excuse to spend three days with Kate and she wasn’t putting up with anyone’s shit.</p><p>I smiled at Kate and said, “I’m in.”  </p><p>Aubree clapped her hands.  “Perfect!  Kate, you have a giant vehicle so you can drive us...”</p><p>“It’s not giant...  it’s a 4Runner.”</p><p>Aubree laughs, “For New York, thats giant.”</p><p>“And it’s going to be cramped.  The back seat is usually fine, but three deep isn’t the most comfortable.  Especially three dudes.  And some bags can go in the back, but the rest will have to be strapped to the top of we’re taking Charlie.”</p><p>Aubree isn’t seeing any downside to this.  “Well that sounds like a plan.  I’ll sit in the back to make more room, and you’ve already figured out the luggage.  Thanks, Kate!”</p><p>Chris looks at me and smiles.  “You want to call Mackie or you want me to?”</p><p>I know what Chris is getting at.  Mackie was looking forward to a guys weekend — he’s going to be less than thrilled that it just got hijacked by a blonde in a jumpsuit.  He’s going to be even less thrilled to learn that the the ratio of men to women is 3:2.  And he’s going to be downright insufferable if he’s the one that has to sleep on the couch.  Yea, he sleeps on the couch at my place — but to be fair, it takes up almost the whole living room.  Who knows what condition this place we’re going to is in.  I mentally prepare on taking one for the team and offering to sleep on the couch.</p><p>“Nah — I’ll call him tomorrow.  It’s pretty late.”  Seemed like a good excuse not to have to cover for him in front of everyone.</p><p>Chris looks at his watch and makes a face.  “How is it almost two?  Dude!  I have a couple meetings tomorrow... uh... today?  I’m going to head back to your place.”</p><p>I hate him for bringing up leaving, but I know I should go with him.  And we all made plans to see each other next weekend, so I know it’s not goodbye.  Then I think of something and lean in to Kate.  “If you need help moving any furniture or want a tour guide around the city, I’m only a few blocks away.  I could give you my number?”  I hold my breath hoping that wasn’t too much — that I shouldn’t have waited until next weekend to exchange numbers.</p><p>“I would love that.”  She smiles at me as she reaches in her back pocket, and hands me her phone.  I program my number and hand it back to her, our fingers grazing in the exchange.  </p><p>Begrudgingly, I tear myself away from the couch.  Away from her touch.  I take a step towards the door and my phone buzzes:  “Now you know where to find me :) Kate”</p><p>I turn back to smile at her and see shes standing and walking towards me.  Chris gives both Aubree and Kate a hug goodnight and reaches for the door.  Aubree walks up and wraps her arms around me as I sling an arm over her shoulders, my eyes locked with Kate’s the whole time.  When Chris is out the door I turn to Kate and pull her to my chest.  She stands up on her toes, wraps her arms around my neck and presses herself tighter to me.  I let my head fall towards her neck and I breathe in the scent of her.  Her hair surrounds my face and smells like coconut.  I could stay here all night, but I let go sooner than I want and let my hands linger at her waist.</p><p>“So I’ll see ya around?”</p><p>She looks up at me and bites her lower lip.  “I can’t wait.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>KATE</p><p>I wish I could stay in his arms. Our bodies were so close, yet not close enough. With my arms over his neck, my body could feel the length of his. And when he lowered his head to my neck, the reverberation from his breath traveled straight down and in between my legs. How could one breath make me so wet? It’s like my body was reacting to him in ways my mind hadn’t yet.</p><p>I’m lucky I was able to get out the last thing I said to him: “I can’t wait.” By the time he left and I closed the door, I felt like I had to steady my breath. I turned around and had forgotten that Aubree was still there.</p><p>“You want to jump his bones, don’t you.” Don’t think I didn’t notice that wasn’t a question. Even after seventeen years, she still knew me better than anyone. Or, maybe I wasn’t as cool as I thought, and maybe it was just apparent to everyone how Sebastian made me feel.</p><p>“What? No... I just... he’s really kind...” I had never been a good liar. I bite my lower lip and smile at Aubree, “okay yea... I kinda do. But that’s ridiculous so I’m trying not to think about it! I’m sure he’s not interested. Maybe he’s just a flirt and I’m reading way too into it.”</p><p>Aubree pursed her lips and raised an eyebrow at me. “Are you fucking kidding me? Look, I know that you’re the smart one here, but sometimes you can be really dumb. He couldn’t take his eyes, or his hands, off of you!” She crossed her arms and shifted her weight so that one leg was kicked out to the side — she’s about to get real. She paused before continuing. “I know what you’re doing. You think that you’re not good enough because that’s basically what Pete told you, and so now that’s how you’re going to act. But he’s not Pete. Pete was an ass! I’m sorry — I know you loved the guy, but he was. You said it yourself — Sebastian is kind. And frankly, I was watching — and he wasn’t looking at anyone else, especially not in the same way that he was looking at you.”</p><p>I tried to ignore the mention of my ex-husband. I didn’t want her to know that it still stung — that the mention of him brought up memories of our happiest times, and not just how things were in the end. I couldn’t let her know that I still cared — that I missed my friend. She wouldn’t understand — most people didn’t. But I lost my husband and part of my family — it didn’t occur to me that I would lose my best friend too.</p><p>I tried to push him from my mind. “What do you mean ‘the same way that he was looking’ at me?”</p><p>“Uhm — like he was hungry for something that only you were cooking,” she giggled.</p><p>The thought of Sebastian wanting me made my body tingle. “Oh god, Aubree!” I laughed as I pushed her away.</p><p>“In case it wasn’t obvious, I’m crashing here tonight. I need pajamas, lest you want all this up on you tonight,” she joked as she danced around the living room singing “I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly”.</p><p>After showering and changing, we laid down on the makeshift bed, giggling and talking about boys — same as we used to do as kids. The act seemed juvenile, but it was oddly comforting. I’d had a good night — no, a great night. I was starting to believe that I had made the right move.</p><p>***</p><p>The next morning, I woke up to Aubree hovering over me. “Fucking finally! I can’t find your coffee pot — can you help me find it?”</p><p>I blink to get my eyes to adjust and try to wake my brain up. “Uhm... don’t... don’t hover over me while I’m sleeping. It’s creepy as fuck. You can’t stay here if you’re going to do that.”</p><p>She rolls her eyes and we both roll off the mattress. “Whatever... coffee?”</p><p>“I don’t have a coffee pot — I need to buy one.”</p><p>She groans loudly. “You’re thirty five — how do you not have a coffee pot? Fine — get dressed then. We’re getting brunch.”</p><p>I looked around at the mattress on the floor and the boxes scattering the apartment. “Uhm, I need to do something about all of this,” I say as I wave my hands around.</p><p>She looks around the apartment and puts her hands on her hips. “Yea... but we need sustenance if we’re going to do manual labor. So brunch, shopping, then furniture and unpacking. Also, I need to borrow some clothes.”</p><p>“Wait... somehow you snuck shopping in there.”</p><p>“You need a coffee maker — it’s un-American to not have one.”</p><p>***</p><p>After grabbing coffee and a bite at Maman, we took the subway up to Lincoln Square so Aubree could stop by her apartment and feed her cat. When she said we could stop at Sur La Table on the way back, I didn’t expect her to try to convince me I needed an espresso machine that had more buttons and knobs than most cars. It took more convincing than necessary to get her on board with my French press.</p><p>As we walked out of the store, my phone buzzed:</p><p>
  <em>Seb:  Hey! It was great meeting you last </em>
  <em>night. I just wanted to let you know that we talked to Mackie, and he’s in for next weekend. Chris and I were going to get some tubes for floating — let me know if you want us to pick you up some!</em>
</p><p>Aubree caught me smiling at my phone and snatched it out of my hands. “Oh my God, you gave him your number? You sly minx! When did this happen?”</p><p>“He gave me his first — he offered to show me around the city.” I shrugged to make my easy attitude seem more convincing.</p><p>“How are you the way that you are? Sebastian Stan is offering to personally show you around the city, and you’re a cool as a fucking cucumber?”</p><p>I took my phone back from her and laughed, “I’m really not. I may seem nonchalant on the outside, but inside I’m chalant as fuck.</p><p>
  <em>Kate:  Hey - last night was fun! I’ll let Aubree know he’s coming too — I’m looking forward to next weekend. If you wouldn’t mind picking up a couple of tubes, that would be great! We’re heading back to unpack and put together some furniture right now.</em>
</p><p>Aubree is quiet on our walk back to the subway. When we get on the train and sit down she turns to me with her brow furrowed. “Honey, I don’t think that chalant is a word...”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>SEBASTIAN</p>
<p>I didn’t believe in the waiting three days before calling or texting — it seemed like bullshit you do in high school to convey that you have better things to do. I didn’t want that — I wanted to see Kate.</p>
<p>Chris wasn’t convinced. “Hey man, if she responds then great. But we’re supposed to see her all next weekend so don’t overdo it. Oh! Let’s get this one,” he shouts as he points to a four person float with built-in ice chest.</p>
<p>“I’m not playing footsie with you for an entire river float. Plus, where would we put Mackie?”</p>
<p>Chris looks confused and then laughs. “Oh shit, he wasn’t the one that I forgot about...”</p>
<p>“You and Aubree — is there a story there? Last night it looked like you were trying to remember if you two had hooked up.”</p>
<p>Chris turns away back to the wall of floats. “I remembered her. I remembered her when I saw her at Marcus’ place. Yea, we spent a few nights together after the play. I gave her my number and she just... wasn’t interested apparently. And it didn’t seem like she remembered me last night so I figured it’d be easier if I forgot it too.”</p>
<p>I put my hand on his shoulder and squeezed. “I’m sure she remembered you, man. That mustache was haunting.”</p>
<p>Chris throws his head back and laughs. “You’re tellin’ me, pal! I hated that thing!”</p>
<p>My phone buzzes and I see Kate’s response.</p>
<p>
  <em>Kate: Hey - last night was fun! I’ll let Aubree know he’s coming too — I’m looking forward to next weekend. If you wouldn’t mind picking up a couple of tubes, that would be great! We’re heading back to unpack and put together some furniture right now. </em>
</p>
<p>Chris sees me smile and laughs. “Oh I know that look. Seb’s in love!”</p>
<p>“You sound like a five year old. I’m not in love — I barely know the girl.”</p>
<p>“Alright then... Seb’s in like.”</p>
<p>I roll my eyes at him. “That’s... that’s not a thing. But if you’re saying I like her... then yea. I do.”</p>
<p>“Well you’d be crazy not to! I mean, I hate to see her go, but I love to watch her leave, am I right?” Chris nudges my arm at the last part, and I stiffen a little.</p>
<p>I look at him and smile, but it doesn’t reach my eyes. “Yea see — you cant say shit like that because it makes me want to punch you in the face.”</p>
<p>Chris holds his hands up defensively. “Dude — say no more. I hope it works out. So — five floats? I think we should get Mackie the unicorn.”</p>
<p>I re-read Kate’s response, and take a chance.</p>
<p>
  <em>Seb: You got it! Chris has decided that he’s picking out the floats for everyone. I apologize in advance for his choices. Let me know if you want help with the furniture — we could easily swing by.</em>
</p>
<p>I put my phone back in my pocket and look at Chris. He has boxes for five floats in his arms, a straw hat on, and is trying to grab the box for an inflatable ice chest. I reach over and grab the box for him. “For beer,” he says, as if I wouldn’t have assumed that. “Let’s see what you got here.” I look at the pictures on the boxes under his arms. “A unicorn...”</p>
<p>“For Mackie.”</p>
<p>“Perfect. A Flamingo.... for.... Aubree?” He nods. I don’t know why, but that makes sense. “Okay. A Triceratops? Who is this for?”</p>
<p>“Uhm... yea that’s mine.”</p>
<p>I raise my eyebrows. “There’s a TRex right there... you don’t want that?”</p>
<p>“Nah, that’s yours, man! Plus — triceratops — so badass!”</p>
<p>But not more than a TRex? “Okay — and I’m guessing the peacock is for Kate. Nice!” My phone buzzes and I look to see a selfie of Kate with a power drill.</p>
<p>
  <em>Kate: I got it 😉 I know you guys just left like twelve hours ago, but I’m going to make tacos around six if you get hungry. I can also prove that I don’t usually live in a sea of cardboard. </em>
</p>
<p>I don’t think I have ever been turned on by power tools. I want to respond but all I can think of is innuendos about drilling her. So I “love” the picture and respond about dinner while Chris is at the register.</p>
<p>
  <em>Seb: I’m always hungry for tacos. We’ll be there! </em>
</p>
<p>I put my phone back in my front pocket as we walk out of the store and look at Chris. “You up for tacos tonight?”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">KATE</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I stared at Seb’s response on my phone.“I’m always hungry for tacos.”There was nothing dirty about it, but my mind definitely thought there was.He couldn’t have known about the comment Aubree made last night about him being hungry for me.Or what did she say?Hungry for what I was cooking?I shook my head and responded.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">
    <em>Kate:Great!We’ll see you two tonight.</em>
  </span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Aubree!We need to find the tequila!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">She runs out of my bedroom holding clothes on hangers over her head.“What happened?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I looked at my phone and back at her.“I may have been impulsive and invited Seb and Chris over for tacos tonight.They’ll be here in like four hours.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">We both looked around the apartment.I had put together the entertainment center and the bookcase — I hooked up the tv and was organizing the bookshelf.“Okay — anything that doesn’t go in the kitchen or the living room, we’ll throw in the bedroom and shut the door.He doesn’t have to see that room.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Aubree raises an eyebrow at me.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Don’t think I didn’t notice that you said ‘he doesn’t’ not ‘they don’t’.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh God, okay — no one has to see my bedroom tonight!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">She turns on her heel to hang the clothes in the closet and I hear her under her breath on her way out.“Mmm-hmmmm.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">***</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Two hours later, Aubree and I stand next to the kitchen bar and look around my apartment.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Dude — it’s official!It finally looks like an adult lives here instead of a homeless person hoarding cardboard!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I look at Aubree and sigh.“Thank you for your everything,” I say as I wrap my arm around her and rest my head on her shoulder.We stand there for a moment admiring our hard work.“And thank you for going to the store to pick up food for tonight....”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">She pushes away and looks at me. “Say what now?This is your deal.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Please?I’ll make a list and you can take my card.I need to shower — like I really need to shower,” I laugh as I smell the my shirt.“And... and I want to look... nice.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">She smiles and pulls me into a hug.“You are beautiful.Always.But you do smell, so yes.Make me a list.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I run through the recipe in my head and make a list.“Is there a carnicería nearby?Somewhere that would have marinated asada?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I think so, hold on,” Aubree says as she checks her phone.“There’s a butcher, Primos — about six blocks away.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I look at the clock and decide that would work.I sent her for asada, avocados, cabbage, a couple kinds of salsa, cotija, limes, cilantro, and chips.I had everything for jalapeños poppers so I could prep those when I get out of the shower.I found the tequila so I added beer to the list, and told her to get anything else she wanted.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">As soon as Aubree shut the door, I locked it and ran straight for the shower, stripping clothes off along the way.I let myself relax a little under the hot water as I inhaled the scent of my coconut shampoo and sea kelp body wash.I shaved while the conditioner soaked into my hair, and exfoliated my face before rinsing. </span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">By the time I got out of the shower, I was giddy.I felt like I was back in high school getting ready for my first date.I know this isn’t a date, but that excitement is there — I had butterflies in my stomach and wore a constant smile.I stood in a towel in front of my closet, brushing my hair — I decided on light, ripped jeans, and a faded black Ramones tee.I rolled the cuff of my jeans and sprayed some coconut oil in my hair — there were some days that I was thankful to have naturally wavy hair.When I looked in the mirror, I felt good.Confident.Myself — which is something I hadn’t felt in a while. </span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I had just finished assembling the jalapeño poppers when Aubree buzzed at the door.She came in looking stressed.“There is food all over New York — why do you insist on cooking?I like this,” she said tugging at my shirt.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Thanks — and I enjoy cooking.It’s how I show people I care for them.And I wanted to thank you for all of your help today.Plus, you know what grandma used to say — the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yes, but I’ve found a very convenient detour through his penis.”We both throw our heads back in laughter.She looked at her phone to catch the time.“Okay so it’s just after five — I’m going to jump in the shower — you can thank me by making me a margarita for when I get out.I’m going to go through your closet!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Wear whatever!” I called after her.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I put the food away, and started on the margaritas. I am of the mindset that one should never cook without a drink in their hand.I poured some coconut cream, tequila, and triple sec over ice, then squeezed some fresh lime juice before shaking.Music — I need music.I grabbed my phone in my left hand, while shaking the margaritas in my right, careful to keep a tight grip on the lid of the shaker.I settled on an 80’s playlist to start with — who doesn’t love the 80’s!</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I was dancing in the kitchen while mixing up the guacamole and sipping my margaritas when Aubree came out of the bedroom in her towel, singing at the top of her lungs.“We’re running with the shadows of the night, so baby take my hand it’ll be alright!”She grabs my hand and twirls me as I join in with her.“Surrender all your dreams to me tonight, they’ll come true in the end!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I pour her a margarita and hand it to her.“Cheers, love!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Cheers!Oh — well this is delicious!Make me these all the time.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I laugh at her and point to the guacamole.“Try that — tell me if it needs anything.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">She dips a chip and chews slowly, thinking, then adds a pinch of salt.“Can I ask you a question?What do you think of Chris?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I sip my margarita contemplating my response.“Okay, let me get through my explanation before you react.He kind of reminds me of Pete...”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You’re ex-husband!?!Great!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Let me finish!He reminds me of the Pete that I fell in love with — the life of the party, the guy that was always smiling and down for anything, but also someone who you could be real with.But because I saw similarities, I didn’t really give Chris a chance last night, and I kind of brushed him off.And that’s on me.You talked to him all night last night.You’re smart — I don’t think it matters what I think.What do you think?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">She looks down at her drink and is quiet.“He didn’t even remember me.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I think you can take some of the blame there... you acted last night like you didn’t really remember him either.And I know you two hooked up — you told me all about it.Every time I saw a picture of his mustache after that, I remember you saying how it tickled when he went down on you — it straight up haunted me.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“It wasn’t a bad tickle,” she laughs.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Okay, so what happened?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“He gave me his number, but I mean come on — he’s Chris Evans!He’s a megastar!And he doesn’t even live here so really how far could it go?I really liked him, but I didn’t want to end up with my heart broken — so I deleted his number and that was it.Good thing too — he had no clue who I was last night!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Maybe he did?Maybe you bruised his ego or whatever.Or maybe you’re just terrible in bed,” I laugh.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh please — I’m phenomenal in bed.It’s definitely not that.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Okay well tonight — start over.Just be real with him and trust yourself.He’d be crazy not to be head over heels for you.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You’re right.I just need some liquid courage.Shots!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh that’s going to be a no from me...”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I wasn’t asking.”Shes already pouring two shots, and slides one to me.“What should we toast to?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I don’t know, every toast I know is inappropriate.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Perfect!Lay one on me.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Here's to me.  Here's to you. <br/>Here's to the guys we fuck and screw. <br/>Here's to them for fucking us over, <br/>and here's to us for never being sober!” </span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Aubree let’s out a squeal as we cheers, and take our first shots. </span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">She looks at me and smirks, “oh it’s going to be a good night!I can feel it!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">There’s a knock at the door and we both jump.I look at her in her towel.“Dude — you need clothes,” I laugh.She runs to the room while I walk to the door — I open it to see Seb.He’s wearing dark jeans and a white tee that hugs his muscles, and my mouth starts to water.I didn’t even notice Chris next to him.</span>
</p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You made it!”I swing open the door, wrap my arms around his neck and press my body tight to him.It’s going to be a very good night.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>SEBASTIAN </p><p>Holy shit she looked good — and she felt even better.  I wrapped my arms tight around her waist and pulled her as close to me as I could.  My hands were on the exposed skin between her shirt and her pants — her skin was soft and warm.  I could feel her breath on the side of my neck, and I had to pull away before she could feel the reaction of my cock.</p><p>Chris holds up a case of Modelo and brings me back to reality.  “Hey — we brought beer to refill your supply.”  He puts an arm over her shoulder and walks to her apartment like that.</p><p>“Oh thanks,” she laughs.  “Aubree picked up some earlier too, and we found the tequila!”  </p><p>I’m a sucker for tequila.  “Sounds like we have everything for a good night!  Oh man — your place looks great!”  I look around and it doesn’t look like the same place as before.  The couch faces a rustic entertainment center, and the leather chairs now flank the couch.  There’s an apothecary table in front of the couch, and a large bookcase on the wall next to the door.  Charlie is laying on a bed between the entertainment center and the bookcase — he seems thoroughly less interested in us today.</p><p>She smiles and looks around approvingly.  “Yea — we worked our asses off today,” she laughs.</p><p>Aubree comes out of the bedroom and joins us.  “It would have gone faster if she didn’t rearrange half of what I did!” </p><p>Kate rolls her eyes at her cousin.  “You know I have OCD — and you were putting things in the wrong place.”</p><p>“Then you should have done the organizing and let me build the furniture.  Hey, guys,” she smiles as she gives us each a hug.</p><p>Kate was her way to the kitchen and calls over her shoulder, “well I definitely don’t think I trust you with power tools!  Anyone want a drink?”</p><p>Chris looks at the bar and sees two glasses and two shot glasses.  “Uh... are you guys drinking milk?  It looks like you started with shots already, but let’s do a round together!”</p><p>Aubree grabs her drink and give it to Chris.  “Try it — coconut margarita.  It’s dangerously delicious.”  </p><p>Chris sips her drink and raises his eyebrows.  “Yea, I’m going to have one of those — Seb too.  But first — shots!”</p><p>We all walk to the kitchen where Kate has poured four tequila shots, and is sprinkling some spice onto four orange slices.  Well that’s new.  “You do orange with your tequila?”</p><p>She smiles up at me as she hands me my shot glass.  “Yea... with cinnamon.  Trust me — it’ll change your life.”  </p><p>Did she just wink at me?  I didn’t give her enough credit — I think she knows exactly what she’s doing to me.  </p><p>“Alright, who’s toasting?”  Chris is always the one on set to start the toasts.  </p><p>Aubree chimes in, “Kate has the best toasts!”</p><p>“Oh come on... they’re not the best and they’re all super inappropriate,” Kate laughs.</p><p>Chris claps his hands together in excitement.  “Hey, the more inappropriate the better, right?  Seb, let’s call Mackie before we forget!”  He turns to Kate and Aubree and elaborates.  “He said he needed to meet you both before he will commit to being in a car for four hours,” he says with a laugh.</p><p>That’s not exactly true, but it was a good cover.  Mackie had read me like a book when we talked this morning and said he wanted to see the girl that’s got me acting like a teenager in love.  Face time seemed far less awkward than me trying to take a picture.</p><p>Mackie’s face shows up on my phone and I’m instantly trying to predict how he’s going to try to embarrass me.  “There’s my Sexy Sea Bass!!”  And here we go.</p><p>“Chocolachino!  What’s happening, man?”</p><p>“Spin me around — who we got?  Who am I talking to?”</p><p>I turn the phone so that Anthony can see the bar where everyone’s standing.  “Alright you know that goofy looking guy over there.  Next to him is Aubree... and this is Kate.”</p><p>“Mackie get up here!  You’re missing shots,” Chris says as he and Aubree hold up their shot glasses to the camera.</p><p>“Bro — I didn’t know!  No one said shit!”</p><p>Kate walks over next to me so the two of us are in frame and says, “Put on your big girl panties, pour yourself a shot, and do one with us!”  After she turns away Mackie smirks and nods in approval at me.</p><p>“Alright, alright — hold on.”  Mackie walks into his kitchen and grabs a bottle of tequila from the top of the fridge.  “I’m not using a glass for one shot so I’ll swig it like a real man!”</p><p>Chris looks at Kate and says, “you’re the ringleader of this disaster — you start us off with a toast.”</p><p>Kate smiles, takes a deep breath, raises her glass, and starts.  “Here’s to honor!!”</p><p>“To honor!” We shout in unison.</p><p>She looks at Aubree.  “To gettin’ on her...”</p><p>Then to Chris.  “...to stayin’ on her...”</p><p>And then she locks eyes with me, licks her lips and says, “...and to pulling out and cummin’ on her!”</p><p>We keep eye contact as we take our shot and I think to myself — yea, she knows exactly what’s she’s doing to me.</p><p>After we all do our shots, Aubree and Chris stand at the bar talking and I walk over to pet Charlie while talking to Mackie.  “So... you got plans the rest of the night?”</p><p>“Oh no — we’re not talking about me.  Ya girl just eye fucked you while saying cum.  Bro!”</p><p>“It’s.... it’s not like that.... like we’re not to that point at all.  We just met.”  </p><p>“Yeah but she wants it!  You both do!  It’s obvious man.  Y’all better not keep me up all night with a banging headboard next weekend though.  You don’t want to see me angry.”</p><p>“That’s... that’s not happening.  I’m taking the couch, anyway,” I say rolling my eyes.  I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think about it — how I could make a move, take the next step while we’re away.  But with everyone around, it seemed difficult.  </p><p>“Alright man — I’ll let you get back to your lady.”</p><p>She’s not my lady — but I like the way it sounds too much to correct him.  “Yea I’ll talk to you later.”</p><p>I hang up and see Aubree and Chris in conversation leaning against the bar, while Kate is cooking something on the stove.  Their backs are to her — so I walk up behind her, loud enough that she can hear me, and slowly wrap my arms around her waist and rest my head on her left shoulder.</p><p>“Hey there” she says lazily.</p><p>“Hey.”  I hug her a little tighter and breathe in the scent of her.  “Your hair smells good — I like it.”</p><p>She spins around in my arms, drapes her arms over my neck, and looks me in the eyes. “It’s coconut.  It’s supposed to make my hair softer,” she giggles.</p><p>I reach up and grab a piece of her hair between my thumb and index finger.  “It’s working,” I say as I tuck her hair behind her ear.  </p><p>She slowly licks her top lip, pulling her bottom one in between her teeth and slowly smiles.</p><p>I take a deep breath and sigh.  “You know your kind of driving me crazy, right? “</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>KATE</p><p>I’m driving him crazy?  No... that’s... no.  “What??  No I’m not,” I laugh awkwardly.  “How?”</p><p>He inches closer, leans down near my ear, and whispers, “so when you bite your lip, it drives me crazy because I want to be the one biting it.”</p><p>“Oh!  Uhm..... I’m sorry.”  I didn’t really know what else to say.</p><p>“Don’t be sorry — it’s the best kind of crazy.  And I like it... a lot.”</p><p>I can feel my face turning red.  Im trying to think of how to respond when the oven timer goes off.  “Uhm...  poppers... I should... I should grab those.”</p><p>He releases me while I grab the jalapeño poppers out of the oven, and Aubree and Chris come over to join us.  We snack on chips, salsa, guacamole, and jalapeño poppers while I finish cooking the meat — but the whole time, Seb’s words are replaying in my head.</p><p>***</p><p>“Dude — those tacos were crazy good.”  Chris is leaning back in one of the leather chairs, with his hands resting on his stomach.  “I’m so full!”</p><p>We all mumble and nod in agreement.</p><p>Chris stands up and makes his way toward the door.  “I’m gonna head downstairs for a quick smoke.”</p><p>“Do you mind if I join?  A cigarette sounds good actually.”  Aubree took up smoking socially a few years back.  It started when she was doing a play — she felt like she was missing out when a group would go out for a smoke break.  She usually only does it if there’s an opportunity for her. </p><p>“Not at all!  We’ll be right back.”  </p><p>They shut the door, and it’s just Seb and I.  </p><p>I gather the plates and start cleaning up, trying to distract myself from the sexual tension that was engulfing the room.  I notice both of our glasses are empty.  “You want a drink?”</p><p>Seb is licking his lips and looks like he’s thinking, focused — he slowly nods.  “Yea.  I can help.”</p><p>He grabs both of our glasses and we walk in silence to the kitchen.  I turn on the water and put the plates in the sink.  When I turn to start packing up the food, Seb is standing at the bar, lost in thought.</p><p>“You okay?”  </p><p>He turns toward me and inhales.  “I’m sorry if what I said earlier was... I just... I really like you and sometimes I get carried away... and... why are you smiling?”</p><p>I walk over, wrap my arms around his waist, and look up at him.  “Because... I like you.  And I like when you get carried away... especially when you carry me away with you.”</p><p>He smiles and as he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear I lean into his hand.  His thumb softly strokes my cheekbone and he says, “it’s sometimes... difficult... for me to control myself around you.”</p><p>I contemplate for a moment before responding.  “Then don’t.”</p><p>His eyes shift back and forth between mine and then down to my lips.  His hand slides down my jaw, and with his index finger, he tips my chin up towards him.  I run my right hand up his abdomen, over his chest and rest it gently behind his neck.  </p><p>I close my eyes, and our lips meet.  I lean in to the kiss, bringing my other arm up to drape over his neck, and going up onto my toes.  His lips part and he runs his tongue softly across my bottom lip, making my body quiver.  His hand moves from my chin to the nape of my neck, his fingers tangling in my hair.  His other arm is wrapped around my waist and he presses my body tightly to his.  He catches my bottom lip between his and gently sucks it, causing me to moan into his mouth.  I part my lips and stroke his tongue with mine, completely lost in this kiss.</p><p>New York could have been on fire, or under attack, but I wouldn’t have noticed — the world outside of Seb and I had completely fallen away.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>SEBASTIAN </p>
<p>I get it now — this is the kind of kiss people are trying to describe when they say “fireworks”.  But even fireworks don’t compare to this.</p>
<p>My heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest.  </p>
<p>The way that she looked at me when she told me not to control myself — to basically give in to my desires.  It was all I could do not to carry her to her bedroom right then.  But I knew Chris and Aubree would be back soon.  </p>
<p>So I kissed her — and life as I knew it would never be the same.  To say that I was falling in love would be the understatement of the century.</p>
<p>Her lips were softer than I imagined, and they tasted sweet — a little like vanilla.  They way she moved her hands over my body made my skin burn with desire.  And when I pulled her bottom lip between mine, she let out a small moan that made my cock throb.  </p>
<p>I slid my hands down her back and slowly across her ass — her absolutely perfect ass.  I could spend eternity getting to know every inch of her body and never tire  of it.  Reaching down, I spread my fingers and grasped each cheek, and lifted her so that she was sitting on the bar, straddling me.  She wrapped he legs around me, gently pressing her calves against my own ass to bring me closer between her legs.  My cock pressed against her, and her breathing increased — even through both of our jeans, I could feel the warmth of her pussy.  I kept one hand on her ass, holding her to me, while the other slowly slip up her waist to her breast, cupping and massaging it.  Her hands were in my hair and softly pulling.  My hand left her breast and trailed to the middle of her back, where I pulled her chest against mine.</p>
<p>I heard the elevator ding, and I could hear Chris’ laughter carrying down the hall.  I slowly, reluctantly stopped what I was doing, and rested my forehead against hers.  Both of us were trying to stead our breaths when Kate looked at me and said, “next time, let’s not invite them.”</p>
<p>I laughed and kissed her lips softly, lifting her off the countertop.</p>
<p>Chris walks in, followed by Aubree, both looking excited and completely oblivious to our breathless state.  “It’s time for a drinking game!”</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>So the game was... intense.  </p>
<p>Two people went at a time, so naturally I chose Kate as my partner.  The game was this:  each person chugs a beer, then has to bounce a ping pong ball into the empty cup.  Once  the ball is made in the cup, then you have to flip the cup.  If the cup lands, then that person places a shot of tequila on a tic tac toe board.  The first person to get three shots in a row is the winner, and the loser has to drink those three shots.</p>
<p>Like I said... intense.</p>
<p>Chris and Aubree were up first, and Aubree completely obliterated Chris.</p>
<p>“Outrageous!”  Chris throws his hands up in defeat and Aubree claps her hands together.</p>
<p>“Oh sweet, sweet victory!  Here you go my friend,” as she slides three tequila shots over to him.</p>
<p>He picks up the first one, and raises it to the rest of us.  “It’s been nice knowing you,” and takes all three shots one after another.</p>
<p>Kate and I step up for our turn.  As we’re about to cheers, she smiles up at me and says, “you’re going down, Stan!”</p>
<p>“We’ll see about that!”</p>
<p>We’re neck and neck the whole round — every time I succeed, Kate is right behind me.  Suddenly, she lands her last flip, and I stare at the three shots facing me.  She holds out her hands and shrugs.  “I’m sorry!  I had to do it!”  She steps forward, places a hand on my chest, stands up on her toes and kisses me — soft.  It was quick — like a habit.  Like it was something we’d do everyday for the rest of our lives. </p>
<p>I smiled at her, completely aware and unfazed that all eyes were on us.  With one arm around her waist, I took my three shots.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>KATE</p>
<p>The floor to ceiling windows of my apartment were one of the main reasons I bought it.  I love the amount of natural light.  Correction — I loved the amount of natural light.  This morning, being hungover, I absolutely hated it.</p>
<p>I rolled over, pulled the pillow over my head and groaned.  “Who’s genius idea was a game primarily of tequila shots?”</p>
<p>Aubree stirs next to me.  “That was Evans.  I take no responsibility.”  She rolls over and throws her arm over her eyes.  “My god woman!  Get some curtains!”</p>
<p>“I need Advil.  And coffee.  And probably water.”</p>
<p>“Yea... bring me all those things.”</p>
<p>“Why can’t you get them?”</p>
<p>“I’m planning on staying in bed and dying today.”</p>
<p>Reluctantly, I roll off the bed and shuffle toward the kitchen.  The whole apartment seems brighter.  I squint my eyes and stumble to the kitchen, bumping against walls and furniture along the way.  I grab a bottle of water and take some Advil.  The water is cold against my lips and it feels like a drop of rain in the middle of a desert.  “Sweet nectar of the gods...”</p>
<p>I hear a quiet laugh and try to focus my eyes on the location.  Then I see it.  Seb is getting leaning over the back of the couch facing me, and Chris is lounged out on the two chairs.</p>
<p>“Morning,” Seb smiles.</p>
<p>“Uhm... hey.  Good morning.”</p>
<p>“Yea — it is.”  He nods towards me and I look down.  </p>
<p>My eyes go wide and I jump behind the bar.  “I’m... god I’m not wearing any pants.”</p>
<p>“Yea I noticed that...” he says as he licks his lips.</p>
<p>“Okay... uhm... Aubree can you throw me some pants?”</p>
<p>A pair of sweats comes sliding, into the living room, barely making it out of the bedroom door.  Maximum effort, Aubree.</p>
<p>Seb gets off the couch, grabs my sweats off the ground, and comes toward me.  When he reaches me, he bends down in front of me, hold out my sweats, and taps my left leg.  I steady myself on his broad shoulders, and balance on my right leg as Seb puts my left foot through the pant leg.  It feels like such an intimate thing to do, dressing someone else.  And having someone dress you, there’s a vulnerability to it that I hadn’t experienced before.  After putting my right leg in, Seb stands, slowly sliding his hands up the back of my legs with my pants in tow.  He looks into my eyes as his hands stop over my lace panties and my breath catches.  He runs a finger between the hem of my panties and my hip.  “I like these.”</p>
<p>“Mmmmm.  I didn’t intend on you seeing them, but I’m glad you like them.”  I run my hands over his chest and up around his neck.  “You stayed here last night.”</p>
<p>He cocks his head to the side a bit and chuckles.  “You told me to.  You said it wasn’t safe for me to walk home without protection.”</p>
<p>“Oh dear lord!  I was very drunk.  Honestly, I think I still am a little.”</p>
<p>He tilts his head down to kiss me and I lean away, leaving him looking puzzled.  “Uhm... so I like really like you... but I haven’t brushed me teeth yet.  Advil took priority.”</p>
<p>He smiles and kisses my forehead before pulling me to his chest.  “What if you brush your teeth, and you and I make a coffee and bagel run for these guys?”</p>
<p>“I like the sound of that.”</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>Seb and I step out of the apartment and I am acutely aware that this is the first time we’ve been truly alone together.  Yea there was last night, but Chris and Aubree were only downstairs.  This felt different.</p>
<p>“Where do you want to go?”  Seb holds the door open for me and I step out into the harsh light of day, quickly putting my sunglasses over my eyes.</p>
<p>“I have no clue.  I haven’t really gone many places yet.  Plus I think you promised to be my tour guide.”</p>
<p>Seb puts his arm around me and pulls me close.  “You’re exactly right.”  He looks around to get his bearings and points to our right.  “Go down and then right on Elizabeth.  Black Seed is down there and they have great bagels.  Hand rolled too.”</p>
<p>My stomach growled — I was starving.  He took his arm off me and we started walking, both looking down.  I realized at that moment that I was walking on the street in New York with Sebastian Stan.  I wanted to get to know Seb, but being out in public was a little intimidating.  </p>
<p>“I’m glad I finally get you to myself for a bit.”</p>
<p>How does he know exactly what to say to make me blush?  “Me too.  Last night... was not enough alone time.”</p>
<p>He laughs and nods his head.  “Yea... but it’s probably a good thing we got interrupted when we did — I may have ended up carrying you to bed.”</p>
<p>My jaw dropped, but I quickly recovered.  Maybe he didn’t notice.  “I would have fought you.  I haven’t organized that room, and the mattress is still on the floor — you can’t see it yet.”</p>
<p>“Yet?”</p>
<p>I smile and shake my head.  “Nope.  That couch though... that’s all yours.”</p>
<p>He laughs, “Oh thanks!  Better than Evans on those chairs I guess.”</p>
<p>“I’m sorry I made you stay.  You really didn’t have to do that.”</p>
<p>“I was happy to.  I like spending time with you.  And you didn’t make me — I would have taken any excuse to stay.  You just gave me one.”</p>
<p>We order bagels and coffee, and walked back to my apartment.  We talked about the coming weekend, how excited we were, and what we should do.  We laugh as Seb tells me about the floats that Chris picked out for everyone.</p>
<p>“I got a peacock?  And you’re a...”</p>
<p>“I’m a TRex.  You should probably be jealous.”</p>
<p>“Oh I totally am!  Can we just acknowledge that Chris thinks a Triceratops is cooler than a TRex?”</p>
<p>“Right?  That’s what I was thinking!”</p>
<p>“I honestly can’t wait to see Mackie riding a unicorn.  I don’t know why, but I feel like that fits him well.”</p>
<p>Seb raises his eyebrows at me.  “Just wait for his reaction to it.  He’s not going to know whether to be annoyed or excited.”</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>By the time we are back in my apartment, Chris and Aubree are watching The Office on the couch.  Both are slouched down, and Aubree is wearing her sunglasses.</p>
<p>We all sip our coffee and enjoy our bagels while planning the logistics for the following weekend.  Aubree will meet at my apartment, and then we’ll drive to pick up Seb, Chris, and Mackie from Seb’s place.  We all agreed that those three, carrying ice chests and luggage down the sidewalk, would probably draw a crowd.</p>
<p>Aubree leans forward, take doff her sunglasses, and has a serious tone.  “We’re not bringing tequila.  It’s the devil.”</p>
<p>Chris shrugs.  “Eh.  We’ll see.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">SEBASTIAN</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“So... what was going on last night?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“What are you talking about?”Chris and I had just left Kate’s apartment and stepped out onto the sidewalk.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Oh you know what I’m talking about,” he said smacking my arm.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Maybe if you were more specific?There was a lot of tequila flowing last night in case you don’t remember.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“You and Kate.You looked like two teenagers that were caught humping.And don’t think we didn’t see her kiss you.Where did that come from?What did we miss over the course of one cigarette?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">I was never one to brag about what happened with girls, especially not ones that I liked.And I haven’t fallen for a girl like I had for Kate before.I wanted to protect our bubble.I didn’t want to taint that.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“I mean... you know.We like each other,” I shrug.“Did you seriously just say humping?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“...And?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“And what?Yea, we kissed.It was nice.What do you want from me?”Nice?Nice was not the word to describe it.But if I played it cool then maybe he’d back off.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Nice?That’s weird...”He furrows his brow in thought and pauses for a minute.“So Aubree and I had a weird conversation downstairs.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Oh yea?”Good.“What about?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He stuffs his hands in his pockets and looks down at the sidewalk.“So she apologized for not calling.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Wait... so she did remember you?Did she say why she didn’t call?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Yea.” He took a long pause before continuing.“She said she threw away my number because she liked me.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Well of course — that makes perfect sense.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He rolled his eyes in response.“She said she was starting to have feelings for me and that since the show was ending, she knew I’d leave, and she didn’t want to go further down that road so she just bailed.Or something.I don’t know she said she didn’t want to end up falling for me and being heartbroken.She was honestly talking so fast it was hard to follow.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Well... I think this is good?Right?I mean, you two like each other.Maybe see what happens?Her reasoning seems a little weird — not gonna lie there.But I think I get it.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Yea.You know Mackie is going to hate being around us next weekend.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">***</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Monday was uneventful.Tuesday was downright boring.And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss Kate.I had spent the better part of the weekend with her, and then to go without her was like going without oxygen.Like I was drowning.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">The thought made me a little uneasy.I had never fallen this fast for someone.It was quick — too quick.But it felt right, so I wanted to trust it.I pull out my phone and open our texts.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">SEB:</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <em>So... I kinda miss you.  That’s crazy, right?</em>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">I set my phone on my chest and put my head back.I tried to remember everything I could from this past weekend.I wasn’t imagining how great it was right?The connection was real.My phone buzzed before I could get too far down this hole.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">KATE:</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <em>
    <span class="s2">It feels a little like quitting something cold turkey, doesn’t it?I don’t like it...</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <em>
    <span class="s2">I miss you too.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">I hung there on those last four words.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">SEB:</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <em>
    <span class="s2">You have plans tonight?Chris has a dinner meeting...</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">KATE:</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <em>
    <span class="s2">What are you thinking?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">SEB:</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <em>
    <span class="s2">Movie and take out at my place?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">KATE:</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <em>
    <span class="s2">Sounds perfect!Is now too early?Lol!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">SEB:</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <em>
    <span class="s2">Haha, not for me!I think Chris is leaving in an hour, so that depends on whether or not you want to see him.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">KATE:</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <em>
    <span class="s2">I’ll see you in an hour.</span>
    <span class="s3">🤗</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">I sent Kate my address and called down to the doorman to let him know she’d be here in about an hour, and to send her up.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Over the next hour, I straightened up my apartment and jumped in the shower.I knew I shouldn’t be, but I was nervous for her to come here.I think there’s a misconception about people being more comfortable on their own homes.I think that’s true to an extent, but I think you’re also more vulnerable — you’re opening up a different part of yourself to someone, literally letting them in.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">I got out of the shower and put on navy blue joggers and a white tee shirt, and ran my fingers through my hair.It was almost seven, so I knew Chris was about to head out.More importantly, Kate would be here soon — and this time it would be just us.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">I went out and sat on the couch, smiling as I heard Chris gathering his things to leave.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Alright man, I’m out of here!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Sounds good — good luck,” I called over my should.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“You need anything while I’m out?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Nah, I’m good. I’m just gonna chill.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Dude, I’m super jealous!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">I smirked trying to hide my amusement.“See you later, man!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">And with that, Chris was gone.I jumped up and did one last sweep around my place, making sure it looked okay.I even ran into the spare bathroom to make sure Chris put the toilet seat down.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">On the way back through the kitchen, I heard a knock at the door and ran to it. When I got there, I stopped and took a couple steadying breaths before opening the door.Kate was standing in the hallway looking down, but when I opened the door her head jerked up.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Hey,” she smiled as she exhaled.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">I stepped out into the hall and wrapped my arms around her, dropping my face to the crook of her neck.It had been too long since I had held her, since I had taken in the scent of her.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">It felt like coming home.</span>
</p>
<p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“I’m glad you’re here.”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>KATE</p><p>I missed him.  I shouldn’t though, right?  I mean, I barely met him five days ago.  But I did.  It was as simple as that.</p><p>Any doubts that I was having quieted when he opened the door, and they completely melted away when he held me.</p><p>“I’m glad you’re here,” he said softly against my neck. The feel of his breath sent a shiver down my body.  </p><p>“I squeezed him tighter.  “Me too.”</p><p>We let go and he laced his fingers through mine, leading me into his apartment.  His apartment was really only a few blocks from mine, but it had an entirely different feel than my pre-war.  His building looked more like an older industrial one that had been modernized.  The kitchen had dark wood cabinetry with massive stainless appliances.  The majority of the walls were exposed brick or painted a deep charcoal color.  The hard wood floors had a dark finish, and there was a huge espresso leather sectional couch that took up almost the entire living room.  There were tall plants in some corners, a large bookshelf filled with books, records, and an antique record player, and lamps scattered in different areas offering warm lighting.</p><p>Seb closed the door behind us and started walking towards the kitchen.  “You want a beer?”</p><p>“Please,” I said following slowly behind him.  “Chris leave already?”</p><p>“Yeah — I’m surprised you didn’t pass him actually.  He left just a few minutes before you got here.”  He handed me an open Stella and we clinked our bottles before taking a drink.  “What are you hungry for?”</p><p>“I could honestly eat anything.  I got busy organizing my closet and forgot to eat lunch.”  It wasn’t exactly the truth.  I was organizing and setting up my bedroom, but I kept getting distracted thinking about our kiss from Saturday night.  The way his body felt pressed against mine — the way he licked and sucked at my lower lip — the way my skin felt on fire when he touched me.  </p><p>Shit — I have to focus.  I could feel my body already reacting to the memory.  I force myself back to reality and see Seb smirking at me.  “What?  What’s that look for?”</p><p>He smiles and shakes his head.  “I was curious what you were thinking...  I had asked if you wanted pizza but you seemed lost in thought.”</p><p>Awkward.</p><p>“Oh...”. I was a terrible liar, but I couldn’t tell him the details of what was going on in my head.  So I just smiled, “Pizza sounds great.”</p><p>We ordered a margherita pizza from Joe’s, then sat on the couch and turned on the TV.  I laughed when I sat back, and Seb looked at me with his eyebrows raised.  “Your couch is huge.  My feet don’t even touch the ground!  How are you ever going to take me seriously if my feet swing?”</p><p>He laughed and sat all the way back with me.  “My feet don’t even reach.  You gotta sit with your feet up,” as he lays back and kicks his feet up on one of the sectional arms.</p><p>I kicked my shoes off and pulled  my legs up to the couch — I’m so glad I opted to wear leggings.  We turned on The Sandlot in the background, and talked while drinking our beers.  We talked about everything — we shared stories about our families and we talked about our jobs.  He seemed genuinely interested and would ask questions.  It was easy to talk to him — it felt like I was talking to someone I’d known forever.</p><p>After a while, I got up to get us some more beers.  When I came back, Seb sat up and set his empty bottle on the coffee table.  I went to hand him a fresh beer, but he shook his head and nodded toward the table.  He reached forward and put his hands on the back of my knees, gently guiding me forward.  I set both bottles onto the coffee table, then took a step towards him.  </p><p>He was looking up at me, his lips slightly parted, and his eyes hungry.  I could sense his desire, which only heightened mine.  I took another small step, placed my hands on his shoulders, and put one knee up on the couch next to his leg.  I searched his face for any indication that I was reading the moment wrong, but instead his hand slid up the back of my leg and cupped my ass cheek.  I brought my other leg up to straddle him, and he moved his other hand to the nape of my neck.  My hands moved to each side of his face as I leaned down to kiss him.  </p><p>A wave of desire hit me as soon as our lips  met.  I inhaled his scent and tried to commit it to memory.  His tongue was soft and warm as he parted his lips to softly lick mine, and he groaned hungrily into my mouth when I nibbled his lower lip.  The sound he made heightened my arousal, making the folds between my thighs wet, and I could feel my clit throbbing with want.  </p><p>Our kiss deepened as my hands found their way to his hair while he squeezed my ass.  I could feel his erection growing beneath me, and I couldn’t help the moan that escaped when I slowly moved my hips against him.  I wanted to give him every part of me over and over again.  His hand left my neck and trailed down to my right breast.  I leaned into his touch, craving more.  I dropped my hand to feel the muscles in his chest, and left his mouth to lay a trail of soft kisses down his neck.  He closed his eyes and moaned in appreciation, then turned my face to capture my lips in his.  His hand dropped from my breast to the other side of my ass, and his hands started gripping and moving with my hips.  </p><p>Until the buzzer rang.</p><p>We froze like that, me straddling him, mid-kiss.  It buzzed again.</p><p>“You’ve gotta be kidding,” Seb groaned.  </p><p>Right on queue, my stomach growled and we both looked down.  </p><p>“Uhm... I hope that’s pizza,” I giggled.</p><p>I rolled off and Seb stands, straightens out his pants, and walks over to the buzzer.  “Hey, Reggie,” he sighs.</p><p>“Delivery, Mr. Stan.  From Joe’s.”</p><p>“Yea I figured...Send it up.”</p><p>He unlocked his door, opened it a bit and looked back at me, smiling.</p><p>“You’re killin’ me, you know that?”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>SEBASTIAN </p>
<p>Kate had barely been here an hour, and somehow I already needed a cold shower.</p>
<p>It was probably my fault.  I knew how long it would take for food to get here — I wanted to kiss her again, to experience what we did last weekend.  What I didn’t account for was the intensity of that kiss and what it might lead to.  I was blinded just by being with her — I didn’t expect her to straddle me the way that she did, and I definitely didn’t expect her to start grinding against my erection.  The material of our clothes was so thin, it teased the closeness of her pussy even more.  I swear I could feel the warmth of her folds spreading over my cock with each motion.  Fuck, I wanted to be inside her, to feel every inch of her naked body against mine.</p>
<p>Then the pizza came.  I wasn’t even hungry anymore.  I mean, I was... but not for food. </p>
<p>We sat on the couch eating pizza and watching the end of The Sandlot, talking and quoting the movie between bites.  To be fair, as much fun as earlier was, I loved this too.  I loved getting to know her and learning about her past.  I knew she moved from Washington, but I learned that both she and Aubree grew up on cattle ranches in a small town in California.  They both had been riding horses since, as Kate put it, before they could walk.  She told me about her family — she had two sisters and a brother, and their mom had left when they were young.  </p>
<p>“Have you ever tried to connect with her?”</p>
<p>“My mother?”  She paused and inhaled deeply before continuing.  “No.  And I don’t particularly want to.  I... I know that makes me seem like a terrible person.”</p>
<p>I wanted to interrupt her and say that she wasn’t.  That nothing she could tell me would make me view her as “terrible”.  But she continued.</p>
<p>“But here’s the thing.  My mother... she isn’t a good person.  She uses people to better herself, and you can’t believe much of what she says.  You... let’s face it.  People know you.  She would use that, capitalize on it. You know once she said that her sister had died in a car accident?  But in reality my aunt is very much alive and lives in Florida.  She’s stolen from all of us, and she lies to everyone.  She practically broke my dad — in every way.  Emotionally, financially... I just don’t want that energy in my life.  You think I’m an asshole now, don’t you?”</p>
<p>“Not at all!  I think most people would be the opposite because it’s hard to be that self-aware and to not allow that type of toxicity into your life — especially with family because there’s a perceived obligation of that unconditional love.  I don’t think it makes you an asshole.  I think it makes you brave.  And strong.”</p>
<p>I talked to her about growing up in Romania, the the move to Vienna, and finally to New York.  I told her about my mom and how she was my hero because of everything she’d done for me.  I told her about my past relationships, and why they ended.  How I thought I loved people in the past, but now I wasn’t so sure, and how that uncertainty scared me.</p>
<p>“So... I told you I’m divorced... “</p>
<p>“You don’t have to tell me any details of you don’t want to.”  I honestly wasn’t sure if I was ready to hear about it.  </p>
<p>“It’s fine... I... I want you to know me.  And this is part of me.  I had started dating Pete when I was seventeen — he was a year older.  We got married when I was twenty-five.  Looking back that seems too young... I didn’t even know myself at that point.  But at the time, it seemed like we couldn’t wait any longer.  You remember how impatient your are in your youth?  Everything has to be right now,” she laughs.  “We moved to Washington for his work and to try something new.  Being that far from everything I knew, except for him of course, made me find out who I was, and who I wanted to be.  Neither of us were perfect — we both fucked up more than a few times.  But he was my person.”  She paused, looked down, and took a deep breath before continuing.  “A few years ago, we started talking about kids.  Then talking became trying.  And trying got us nowhere.  After a year and a half, we went to a specialist and tried it all.  I mean, every blood test you can think of, pills, daily injections, legs up in the air... and nothing.  They call it unexplained infertility.  The unexplained part is the most frustrating — like not only does my body not work the way it’s meant, but no one even knows why.”</p>
<p>I reached over to hold her hand — it seemed like the most minimal effort, but I didn’t want to interrupt her or to overwhelm her.  I wanted to support her.</p>
<p>“Anyway... long story short... he slept with someone.  A friend of ours, actually.  There was a lot of alcohol involved apparently.  I don’t know... obviously I wasn’t there.  We were working through it when she found out that she was pregnant.  And I couldn’t be the reason that a kid didn’t have a family.  I knew myself.  And as much as I would try not to, I would hold resent in my heart.  And I couldn’t do that to an innocent child.  So, we decided to separate.  And a year and a half later, here I am,” she shrugged.  As if it were no big deal — as if she didn’t just bare her heart to me.</p>
<p>I held her hand, stroking the back of it with my thumb.  Kate was strong — I knew she didn’t want pity or sympathies.  “What you did, was selfless.  And strong.  You put the possibility of salvaging your marriage aside for a family.  And I don’t know Pete, but I’m having a hard time knowing whether I want to punch him in the face for what he did, or to shake his hand and thank him.  He’s an idiot for letting you go — but if he hadn’t, then I would have never met you.”</p>
<p>She looked up through her lashes at me, and gave me a small smile.  “I got a little too real for a first date, didn’t I?  It’s been a long time since I’ve been on one,” she laughed.</p>
<p>“I think we’re definitely passed the first date awkwardness — I’ve seen you in your underwear.”</p>
<p>She covers her face in embarrassment.  “Oh god!  Don’t remind me!”</p>
<p>I reached towards her and pulled her hands away from her face.  “Thank you for sharing your life with me.”  I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, and cup her cheek.  “I feel lucky to know you.”  She rests against my hand, and I lean in to kiss her soft and quick.  It wasn’t about making out — I was something deeper.  Something emotional.  The truth of it was this:  I was falling for her, and for the first time, I wasn’t scared of falling hard.</p>
<p>I rested my head against hers — completely lost in the moment.  We sat like this for I don’t know how long.  It took Chris coming through the door to bring us back to reality.  </p>
<p>“Oh!  Hey, Kate!”  </p>
<p>“Hey, Chris.  How’s it going?”</p>
<p>“Eh — it’s fine.  I had a work meeting — boring topic, but the food was good.  So I can’t complain too much. “</p>
<p>“Food can make or break any situation,” Kate laughed.  She looked at her phone then turned to me.  “I should probably head home.”</p>
<p>“I’ll walk you,” I said as I stood.  I’m never ready to say goodbye to her.</p>
<p>“You really don’t have to do that.”</p>
<p>“Are you kidding me?  It’s dark and this is New York.  I have full faith that you can handle yourself, but I’m still walking you home.”</p>
<p>“Seb’s right... it can be sketchy,” Chris chimes in as he opens a beer from the fridge.</p>
<p>“Well thank you.  It was good seeing you Chris!”  </p>
<p>Chris walks over and gives Kate a hug as we walk out the door.</p>
<p>“See you Friday” he calls after us.  </p>
<p>Once we’re on the sidewalk, I lace my fingers through hers as we walk lazily back to her building.  I was more comfortable like this at night — there was less of a chance of someone taking our picture.  I didn’t want her to have to deal with everything that came with my career.  At least not yet — I knew it would come eventually.</p>
<p>We talked a little as we walked.  She really didn’t live far — I liked how close she was, but I wished we had longer together.  As we walked up the steps to the door, she turned towards me and kissed me.  It was soft but passionate.  Her hands ran from my shoulders down to my chest as she pulled away.  </p>
<p>She looked at me, her eyes searching mine.</p>
<p>“Do you want to come in?”</p>
<p>My breath caught in my chest.  “Yea... yea I do.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>KATE</p>
<p>“Do you want to come in?”</p>
<p>I had thought the whole walk home about whether or not I would go through with asking that question.  I held my breath, nervous for his response — what if he said no?  I would be mortified.  That fear of rejection was so loud in my head, I didn’t think there was a possibility that he would say yes.</p>
<p>“Yea... yea I do,” he said quietly.</p>
<p>I turned and opened the building door while the butterflies grew in the pit of my stomach.  We walked in silence to the elevator, and once the door closed, I felt that same electricity that I had the night we met.</p>
<p>“Thank you.”</p>
<p>He looked over at me, puzzled.</p>
<p>“For tonight.  I’ve had a really great time.”</p>
<p>“Me too,” he smiled.</p>
<p>The elevator doors open and we walk to my front door. My heart is pounding so much that it feels like my chest might break open.  I try to unlock the door but my keys are shaking because I’m nervous.  Seb closes the gap between us and wraps his arms around my waist, planting a trail of soft kisses down my neck. </p>
<p>I moan and tip my head to the side.  “That’s very distracting.”</p>
<p>I feel him smile against my skin in response.  I finally unlock the door, open it, and take his hand leading him inside.  He closes the door and pulls me back toward him.  I turn to face him and place my hands on his muscular chest.  I can feel his heart beating.  I slide my hands up, over his shoulders and around his neck, pulling myself to feel the length of his body.  He wraps his arms around me, one low on my waist, and the other high on my back.  </p>
<p>He rests his forehead against mine and sighs.  “I want to tell you something.  You were really open with me earlier and I really appreciate that you were willing to do that.  I just want you to know, it’s been a long time since I’ve felt this way for someone.  And that this... you and me... it’s important to me.  You’re important to me.”</p>
<p>I move my hands to either side of his face, tilt my chin up and kiss him softly.  Then I pull back to look him in the eyes.  “I feel the same way.”</p>
<p>Seb smiles, leans down and captures my lips in his and he squeezes my body tightly.  I part my lips to run my tongue against his lips.  Our tongues meet and dance between our mouths.  My hands moved across his shoulders, down his chest, and over his abs to his hips.  I can feel his growing erection pressed against me.  The feel of his arousal heightens mine.  I take a step backward, pulling his body with me, never breaking our kiss.  His hands move down my body, one cupping my ass and the other massaging my breast.  I start moving us through my apartment, passing the couch.</p>
<p>Seb starts kissing my neck and nibbles my earlobe.  “Where are you taking me,” he whispers.  His breath against my skins sends shivers down my body, and I moan.</p>
<p>“Mmm... I want to show you what I did to my bedroom today...”</p>
<p>He looks at me and smirks, “I thought I wasn’t allowed in there?”</p>
<p>I laugh and kiss him again.  “Well... that was before I cleaned it.”</p>
<p>He deepens the kiss as I continue moving us to the bedroom door.  Our kissing gets more passionate the closer we get, and our hands are all over each other’s bodies.  I move my hands down his body and rest one hand on his lower back pulling him to me.  I slide my other hand between us and rub the length of his erection — he groans in response and his cock presses against my hand.  I move my hands to the hem of his tee shirt and pull it over his head.  I go back to kissing him while my hands are exploring his naked chest.  His muscles are sculpted like a piece of art.  He reaches for my shirt as we reach the bedroom and pulls it off, exposing the navy blue, lace bra that barely covers my breasts.  He looks at me and licks his lips — the sight of him admiring me turns me on more than I already was.  </p>
<p>I reach behind his neck and pull his mouth to mine.  The feel of our chests, skin on skin, sends a fire coursing through me.  I place my hands on his chest and pull away from his kiss.  Keeping my eyes locked on his, I slowly kneel in front of him, pulling his pants and his boxers down with me, exposing him.  Taking his cock in one hand, I licked my lips before licking the tip of him.  I slowly spread my lips over his tip, and started taking him in my mouth, him moaning in response.  He was too big to take all the way in my mouth — I used my hand to slowly work the base of his cock while I sucked the tip and the shaft.  His eyes never left mine — I loved watching him watch me.  And hearing his breath hitch or his breathing speed up made me want to please him even more. </p>
<p>He leaned down, pulled me up to him, and kissed me, tasting himself in my mouth.  He put both hands on my ass and lifted me, so I wrapped my legs around him.  Taking the few steps to the bed, he put a knee down and laid us down on it.  When he leaned back and pulled my leggings off, he looked surprised.  </p>
<p>“Were you commando this entire time?”</p>
<p>I giggled and rubbed my legs together.  “I usually don’t wear underwear — seems unnecessary.”</p>
<p>He sakes his head smiling and lays over me.  “You’re killing me... like you drive me crazy, you know that?”  

He trailed kisses down my neck and collarbone to my breasts, pulling the light fabric down to expose my hard nipples.  He sucks my left nipple while massaging my right — the feeling makes me so wet.  He continues down, kissing my stomach, then each hip, until he reaches between my legs.  He runs a finger between my folds before dipping it into me.  I almost cum at the sight of him taking that finger out and sucking the wetness off of it.  My back aches as he inserts two fingers into me.  He gently starts licking my clit while his finger work inside of me.  I push my fingers into his hair and clench the sheets, knowing I won’t be able to hold on long.</p>
<p>I sit up and he sits back on his heels, stroking his cock.  I move closer to him and straddle him, the weight of his erection resting against the front of me as I look into his eyes.</p>
<p>“I want you, Sebastian.”</p>
<p>I take his cock in my hand, raise up, then lower myself slowly onto him.  I arch my back as he fills me, thrusting my nipples towards him.  He squeezes my ass with one hand, and massages my right breast with the other as I take the full length of him inside of me.</p>
<p>“Fuck you feel so good,” he moans.  </p>
<p>I capture his mouth with mine and thrust my tongue into his.  Slowly, I start riding him — moving up and down while grinding against him.  I can feel my orgasm building inside of me and I try to hold on.  He grabs my ass and lays me back onto the bed, never leaving my pussy.  I pull my legs up and he grabs one to lift over his shoulder, thrusting deeper the higher my leg goes.  Our breathing increases with each thrust.  </p>
<p>“I’m close, Sebastian...”</p>
<p>“Me too baby.... let go,” he says as he kisses my my calf that’s draped over his shoulder.</p>
<p>His words send me over the edge — I arch my back, fist the sheets, and let go.  “Yes!  Oh god yes!”</p>
<p>“Oh fuck!” Seb cries out as he releases deep inside of me.</p>
<p>He lowers my leg off his shoulder, pulls out, and rolls beside me.  I turn to kiss him and he smiles.  “Why are you smiling, you weirdo?”</p>
<p>He laughs, “I like your bedroom.”</p>
  </div></div>
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